nothingness

I'm not telling how I feel,

I feel nothing at all.

Every emotion is gone.

Don't care if I fall.

Can't tell up from down.

The world is spinning 'round.

And yet it all stands so still.

And nothing feels real.

I'm not sure what to say,

It doesn't make any sense.

There's nothing that goes right.

I see the door; the fence..

I see the world go by.

The clouds float in the sky.

Everything is making sound.

Except for me, I can't be found.

I don't see what to do.

The end seems so near.

The end of this war.

But there's nothing I can see clear.

In deep waters I still tred.

The cold wishing me dead.

But the ground holds more fear,

So I wanna just stay here.

Maybe let my heart drown,

In the water of salt.

Drown in my own missery,

Knowing its all my fault.

Even if its not the same.

I'm still going to take the blame.

It's easier for me to do.

Than to put some of it on you.

With knowing it's my fault,

It's easier to deal.

Easier for me to fix,

And feel what I need to feel.